What is the path before us?
Do we have the power to affect the path?
Are we destined to suffer because we've experienced our trauma or the trauma of others?
I don't know the answer to the last one because I don't have the power to know that. What I do know is that I used to believe that PTSD meant being imprisoned in our own personal prison, locked up inside our own minds. I realize now that we do have the power to affect the path. Think of it like shoveling snow. It's so satisfying to shovel the snow and to clear a path. You feel like you really accomplished something to see all that snow moved out of the way, until you go outside a few hours later and the snow clogged up the path again. It's so much work! It's so exhausting, time consuming, and mentally frustrating. I just did all that work and now I have to go do it again. PTSD feels a bit like that. I thought I dealt with that, or I thought I fixed that, but then the path seems to get clogged up again. PTSD is a lot of work, but when you have some useful tools on hand to shovel your path out, it can be less daunting. You can begin to feel the progress, rather than the frustrating experience of feeling like you haven't gone anywhere, except backwards. It took many years to figure out that I was holding the shovel all along and didn't know it.
*image: Google images