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Seeds of Discovery

In the post I wrote yesterday, I spoke a bit about the importance of the teams we find ourselves a part of.  These teams exist in the workplace, a squad, a unit, a family, a platoon, and so on.  Each of these teams helps us to define our role, our place, and sometimes our identity.   It can be a challenging scenario when you no longer feel like you are part of that team due to injury, change of duty station, deployments pulling you away from families, families feeling distant when you return home, or even the situation of being injured and separating from your service.  Although it may not be officially classified as a traumatic event, it certainly can create high levels of anxiety, uncertainty, fear, sadness, and loneliness.    My greatest fear when I hear a soldier is separating from the military or police officer is retiring or a firefighter can no longer fight fires, is that they may get lost.  They have signed up to do a job that only a small number of people have the physical ability to do and the courage to do.  It's unfathomable to me to think of them separating from their service and thinking that they are now not worth much at all. 

 Every person who has given their life to service for the good of others deserves time to heal, time to rest, and time to enjoy their life.  

 Each of you deserves moments of rest, appreciation, and support for a job well done.  But what do you do when you feel down, out of the game, and lost when you have that new-found time to rest, to "enjoy", to be with your families.  It doesn't always feel as good as everyone says it should or maybe the way we think it should.  There is a period of reintegration that must take place, but what I've learned is that it's not always about waiting out the time because sometimes many years go by and you still feel that way.  The family grows further apart and no one really knows what happened or where the time went.  Using meditation as a tool to connect with yourself was the key that I discovered in all of this.   I have not served, as I have shared before, but the disconnect when you do not feel whole on the inside is something that can happen to anyone who has a high stress job or has been through trauma.  

When you have a tool on hand to connect with yourself, it helps you to close the gap with others.  It helps you to understand your response to others and gives you a way to process the uncomfortable things that come up while you are in that period of reintegration.   We all want our families to be happy, to be healthy, to be whole, but how can we make that happen when we ourselves do not feel happy, healthy, or whole on the inside.  Remember that how you feel on the inside often radiates out from you.  Others can feel it because of the bioenergy field we all emit.  Others can feel when you aren't yourself or if something is bothering you.  Families often want to help, but from my experiences with soldiers, I either hear that they come on too strong wanting to "fix" and "help" so much that you want to jump out of your skin or they back away and leave you to your own devices hoping you'll "come around" when you are ready.   Neither scenario usually works out too well because nothing is being done to close the gap.  No one is feeling connected to themselves on the inside and it creates a bio-energetic divide that everyone can feel without even speaking.  If you aren't sure you agree, just think about the last time you felt really "off" and think about how the people around you responded.   Did they back away? Did they ignore you?  Did they hound you? Did they simply hug you and tell you it's okay to feel the way you do?   There isn't a right or wrong answer here.  It's just the experience that you simply had.  Families don't always know what to do when someone is suffering from the effects of trauma.  They love you, but they only know how to do what it is in their experience to do.  Education can do wonders, but the real the work has to come from inside of you.   When you are accepting of you and when you release the judgment you have for you, it makes it much easier to connect with others because they will then reflect the acceptance of you right back.   It closes a little ounce of the gap at a time.    

I speak from experiences in my own life, my own injuries, and my connection to the military.  Many soldiers have said to me that I need to share what I've learned because it can help people, so that's why I am doing what I am doing.  If something I say plants a seed for you to think about, then that is the most important thing I can offer.  We all must find our way through the effects of trauma and stress.  There isn't one quick fix for it.  It is a process and part of the process is taking those seeds that make us question where we are at and helps them to grow into the seeking of knowledge that will help us breakthrough it all one little piece at a time.  
 *images: Google Images

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