Honor. What does it mean to honor your own path? Suffering can last years for many people as they struggle with the memory of places they've been, things they've seen, and the energetic imprints that have left long-lasting impressions on their lives. There seem to be constant reminders of everything that isn't right with you or things that you aren't currently doing right for yourself or for others. These reminders serve as what I think of as a neural superhighway to your brain. They make sure you are on the fast track to feeling like you don't deserve the ground you are standing on. Is there honor in this kind of suffering?
Recently, the news featured the most recent "Medal of Honor" recipient. This is someone we see as a hero. He has received the highest of honors and it is with great honor and respect that we look to him. Yet, for him, he said on the news that he would wear it, but that he was having trouble hearing his name and "HERO" in the same sentence.
The road to being a hero is full of blood, sweat, and tears. It is filled with defeat, self-loathing, and weakness. It is filled with self-doubt, self-criticism, and self-deprecating behavior. This is often confusing for real heroes. It is often they who look in the mirror and say, "Why me?" "I just did my job."
These heroes are those that must not be forgotten or left to ride out their parades and accolades alone because it is often these heroes that walk a very lonely path of being confused by the losses they've suffered and carrying a great honor for heroic acts. Heroes don't often share how lonely their path is when the parades have ended, the excitement of their return fades, and the loving attention of being home turns to frustration and confusion.
When you honor where you are and honor who you are in this moment, it's okay to feel as you feel right now. There need not be a solution in this exact moment. There need not be any pressing answers. Just sit with you. Introduce yourself to you again and recognize that embracing who you are, honors every hero that ever walked our soil.
As a nation we can only heal one person at a time and that's true of any nation. We aren't the only country suffering with these kinds of wounds. As a human race, the suffering is suffering alike. As human beings, honoring that we are each here for a distinct purpose matters. Honor isn't just about sacrifice. Honor is about standing strong in the face of adversity and sometimes standing strong means being strong enough to release your grip on what no longer serves your highest good.