I've been told in a few sessions over the last couple of months that people feel a vibration off of my words when I am speaking a meditation to them. I was asked, in particular, if that vibration is real? The answer is yes. Everything we speak carries a vibration. We ourselves emit a vibration and I've talked about this quite a bit with Reiki clients. We all emit a vibration all the time. The easy way to explain this to you is when someone walks into a room and they are in a bad mood and you instinctively can feel it without them ever saying anything that alerts you to their mood. This scenario is a vibration they are giving off that is unseen. The same is true when you meet someone who is inspired and gives off this vibe that you want to be around. The soldiers would make me laugh because they always said they felt better just sitting next to me.....now we can all chuckle at a few different reasons why....however, they would always say there was something unseen about me that was comforting to them. They could feel my sense of compassion for them without me ever saying anything. This is vibration in action. I cared; they knew it.
Now to prove to you words have vibration, place your hand gently on your throat and say, "I am right where I am supposed to be." Blink twice if you can tell me that you feel something. The vibration you are feeling is emitted and it is directly translated to and from your brain. When your brain picks up the signal that this is a positive statement, it radiates through your body.
Imagine now that you are saying something pretty awful about yourself and allowing that to vibrate through your body. It essentially "infects", for lack of a better term, the body and the brain. The brain responds to negativity through stress hormones, fear, danger, etc. and will respond in kind, radiating tension through the body.
Be careful how you speak to yourself, about yourself, and through yourself. It makes an impact in your cells. Now I'm not the type to not be realistic, but behaviors can be changed; never all at once, but becoming simply aware of when you are beating yourself up....unfairly.....which is always......then you can begin to put it in check.
Consider this the next time you tell yourself you aren't worthy of being here. Maybe you are the survivor or the one who came out physically unscathed, but your buddies or fellow officers didn't. There is a huge sense of survivor's guilt and the feeling that it should have been you. The short answer to this is that if it was supposed to be you, it would have been you. You were spared because there is still work for you to do and honoring your buddies by healing is exactly what I believe in my heart they would have wanted. Beating yourself up and creating more suffering because you feel that's what you are supposed to do isn't the answer. Inspiring others to heal through your own healing is. Pay attention to the vibration you are emitting, it is impacting you and those around you. It can be felt, but it can be altered simply through the spoken word and the words you think.
Don't give up on your mission or your skills. You are well equipped. You've been trained. You've been encouraged. You've been given tools to succeed. You would never go onto a battlefield expecting to lose. You go in with the mindset to conquer and succeed. Why should this be any different? You are equipped in the same way, with the same training, but we've wired ourselves to feel that we don't have what we need anymore for this battle and that is simply untrue. You aren't broken, your resolve is simply being tested. Does that mean giving up is the answer?
It's okay. We all know the answer to that. A moment of silence is probably best right here.