Have you ever watched a scary movie with the sound off? Although the images can still be questionable, but it is the music that tells you how to feel about what's happening. This influences how you feel about what you are seeing.
For many people, the anniversary that took place yesterday brings them right back to the moment they were in. It seems there is no escaping the media attention of that day and it can feel like that for many. As I have said, there is a purpose for all of this and it helps people to remain alert and give a reminder of why our nation is still fighting, however, I think that sometimes in our remembering and honoring we think we are doing great good and I believe we are to a degree for those that have been lost, but on the other side of that for the people who were there that day it is more than just remembering; it is feeling it all over again.
The media can be a trigger for PTSD and when every device you turn on has images of that day....that can just reignite feelings you thought you had been dealing with already. The other part of this that I see, as someone who lives with PTSD, is being told how to feel. When you have PTSD, no one, except others with it, can truly understand what it feels like. You, yourself, can barely put it into words and even if you did try to put it into words....who's really going to understand?
So for example there are many, many places online and in the media that are telling you to mourn, telling you to be angry, telling you to fight, telling you to be this or to be that. I draw the line right there and ask that you just be where you are, wherever it is that you are. There is no right way to heal and as someone who teaches meditation and deals with teaching people about the nervous system and how it perceives and handles stress, the best thing we can do is just allow how we feel and step away from what feels like a PTSD trigger to give ourselves some time to just be. If you are numb, okay. If you are sad, okay. If you are confused, okay. You do not need to fit inside the societal ideal of how to grieve that day nor any traumatic event you've lived through. Be as you are and be kind to yourself.
Developing respect for how you feel in the moment you feel it, is part of the healing of process. I wish you all peace in your hearts knowing that it matters that you are here and are taking steps to take care of yourself in a way that is respectful of what you've been through.